it’s 1964 I’m on a balcony smoking a really long cigarette and some lofty music is playing I drop my martini on the floor it breaks and 5 men scramble to get me a new one

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  • grandma: DO YOU WANT AN APPLE
  • me: no thanks grandma
  • grandma: HERES YOUR APPLE
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can i get a one way ticket to being attractive please

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